Being an ally, action not words

As a perfectionist, I often struggle with doing anything that I may not get right. I dread to think about how much time I’ve spent pondering over an important email, procrastinating over assignments, or stopping myself from starting a new hobby because I’m paralysed by the fear of getting it wrong.

So, it feels strange to be writing about being an ally, as I don’t consider myself to be an expert or someone particularly worth listening to, but that’s not what being an ally is about. It is about allowing yourself to feel that fear of getting it wrong but taking action anyway.  

Considering this year’s theme for Black History Month, action not words, I wanted to share with you some of the lessons I have learnt, and how you can be an ally at work.

The inner work is the most important and the most difficult part

As I started the move from being passive to actively anti-racist, I did a lot of self-reflection about how me being passive perpetuated racism in different scenarios. This was tough. It meant stopping making excuses for myself and be truthful about the role I played, feeling the guilt without wallowing and taking accountability.

Sounds easy right? It certainly isn’t, especially as I do struggle with my mental health, my brain so easily likes to grab hold of things to use to beat myself up with. That’s not what doing this work is about, it’s about realising that you don’t need to be overtly racist to be a part of the problem. It’s learning about yourself, why you behave or think the way you do – why you might not have said anything when you heard a colleague or friend say something racist and trying to work through those reasons, so you’re better prepared to show up as an ally in the future.

Educate yourself

Educating yourself on race issues is so important, and how you do this may look different dependent on the way you learn. With a busy life and sometimes finding it difficult to concentrate on books, I find listening to podcasts, reading articles, following advocates on social media, attending events at work, signing up for webinars are all good ways to continuously learn in my day-to-day life. As an ally it is your responsibility to do the work. Do not rely on your black friends or colleagues to educate you, there are so many resources out there ready and available for you to use.

Supporting vs Speaking Over

There is a fine line between being a supportive ally and speaking over the experiences of people from marginalised groups. Listen, truly listen (don’t just wait to speak!), and then think about what you can do to support. In a work setting, you could learn about the resources that are on offer for a colleague who is experiencing discrimination, so you are ready to signpost them if they wish to access.   

At DWP, we have ambassadors for fair treatment who are trained colleagues and are approachable at a time of need, to listen in confidence and to empathise with anyone who believes they are facing bullying, harassment, or discrimination and to signpost to further support where appropriate.

There is no end to being an ally

When I first started to write this blog, I called it ‘my journey through allyship’. I wondered why this title didn’t work. Then I realised; a journey implies there is a destination, but this isn’t the case with allyship, you can’t achieve it or arrive to it. For me allyship is an evolving process, as I started doing the work, I noticed a gradual development in my listening skills and knowledge and have become more useful in tackling racism. I don’t always get it right and there’s always more I can do, but the point is to stick at it.     

I am incredibly lucky to work for DWP, an organisation which values an inclusive culture and provides me with the resources to be an ally at work. I’m looking forward to attending some of the many fantastic events that DWP’s National Race Network have put together this year for Black History Month 2022.