‘Sometimes we don't have the words, or the knowledge, to know that what we're experiencing…’: Chris from DCMS shares his experience about men’s mental health

Chris, a Project Manager at the Department for Digital, Culture, Media and Sport, talks about his experience with mental health as a man, and the effects of mental health in the workplace.

In general, I consider myself to be a very normal (perhaps even boring!) person. I have never been diagnosed with any kind of serious health problem, mental or otherwise, and quite simply mental health is not something I ever thought much about until about 5 years ago or so.

So you may ask yourself why I am talking about mental health at all - a fair question to ask.

When I began to research mental health struggles and symptoms I started to realise that during some difficult periods of my life I certainly must have been struggling with stress, anxiety, possibly even depression. I would stay up far too late playing video games, I wouldn't sleep or I would sleep far too much (whilst feeling very tired no matter what), I wouldn't eat or I would eat far too much. In general I simply wouldn't feel anything at all - my favourite comedies did not even make me laugh (although I am sure some might say that is simply my bad taste in comedies!).

I could not talk to anyone about these issues because I did not even realise or know at the time that these things were symptoms of a bigger mental health issue.

These are the kind of barriers that men face when it comes to improving their mental health. Sometimes we do not have the words, or the knowledge, to know that what we are experiencing is not normal or healthy. It is difficult to find an answer when you did not even know there was a question to be asked.

In my day job I am a Project Manager, and there is a certain rhythm that comes with running a project. There are periods of high workload and stress at the start when you are setting things up and getting a business case approved. There are periods of high workload and stress as you reach the end and gain all the agreements to close the project and hand things over to BAU - if you are lucky the delivery part in the middle is a bit less stressful.

Getting an understanding of when the stresses of my role will be at their greatest helps me to plan for how to deal with increased stress and then to recover afterwards. DCMS's Wellbeing Resource Pack and especially the '5 pillars of wellbeing & resilience' guides how I do this planning. It reminds me to focus on eating well (rather than ordering takeaways!) and practically I do this by meal prepping on Sundays, or sometimes it can be as simple as asking my partner for help in ensuring we are both eating healthily.

I also like how it talks about having a 'Future Focus' which you can interpret in many (equally correct!) ways. One 'Future Focus' I have is my longer term career goals and that helps when dealing with a particularly difficult problem because I know the experience of solving these problems supports meeting my career goals. Even 'failing' to solve the problem is a learning opportunity that supports those career goals. Yet at the same time my 'Future Focus' can be "at the end of this week I can play a game I'm really excited to try" or "thank goodness we managed to book Peter Kay tickets even if it's not until 2024!".

This can be applied to my work life when I know that a stressful, busy period is coming up. I can plan to put an extra focus on my mental health during the stressful period, and I can plan to make sure I give myself a break once the stressful busy period has passed. When you are a project manager everything turns into a plan!

But, perhaps most importantly for me, learning more about how mental health affects me and the ways that I can improve and cope with my own mental health gives me the tools to look out for my friends, family and colleagues mental health as well.

It definitely starts with you though, you have to understand how your mental health works first and it is not easy. I am still learning now and I probably will keep learning for many more years to come

If you would like to find out more about the well-being and mental health services DCMS provides, which Chris referenced, you can read more here.